The Stress Cycle Explained Plus Tools to Help You Manage

Picture this: you're working on a tight deadline and the pressure of the work becomes too much. While sitting at your computer you find yourself becoming increasingly distressed; you’re having racing thoughts, you’re unable to focus, and your heartbeat quickens. Maybe you start sweating more, perhaps you toggle between different tasks and documents wondering where to go next with no clear direction. The intensity of your internal experiences feels too much to handle, and you are overwhelmed and uncertain about how to help yourself. Even though you may have learned new tools and strategies in therapy or on your own, now they are nowhere to be found. Or, even if some of the tools did pop into your head you were resistant to try them, choosing instead to sit in your distress and keep the stress cycle going. I hear countless times from clients that while those exercises learned in session were helpful they could not implement it when needed.

So, what is happening in these moments?

Essentially your stress response system (fight, flight, freeze) is being activated, which creates a cascade of stress hormones and other internal mechanisms to switch on, alert us of danger and create a physiological response to motivate us to act or become immobilized. This is done in an attempt to survive. Moreover, the more intense the stress response, the more inhibited our pre-frontal cortex is (i.e. our processing and thinking brain). After all, when there is an imminent threat we need to utilize our energy to survive and intellectualizing is not one of the most vital skills for doing this. This means we will be running more on automatic and predictable patterns rather than being able to use a combination of logic and emotion to process the situation and act accordingly. While this mechanism can be invaluable when experiencing a real threat, it can hinder us when activated during everyday situations like the one previously mentioned. It can become especially difficult when our automatic responses do not match with the situation.

While there are a few universal triggers, for the most part, what triggers us is often a unique experience based on what we’ve learned over time.

What can we do?

When our stress response is activated, learning tools to manage and work through the cycle is essential. Coping involves using conscious or unconscious techniques to manage and lessen unpleasant emotions, physiological sensations and distressing thoughts. Coping tools will not eliminate or resolve problems on their own. The goal of using these tools is to manage life’s stressors more adaptively so that when faced with stressors (which happen to varying degrees each day) you can navigate them with increasing confidence and ease.

Outsourcing is one of the best things we can do to take problem-solving and thinking out of the equation (which is likely inhibited in these moments anyway), which is why creating a personalized toolbox can be beneficial. What we are hoping for is to get ourselves back to an optimal arousal zone so that we can effectively function once more.

Here are some suggestions to help you get started. Practicing these tools during various levels of arousal and keeping them easily accessible will make it more likely for you to use these tools. Additionally, understanding your triggers and sensitivities can help you be more prepared for when your stress response is activated.